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Telling Tanktales

No drawing or painting skills? Not proficient in graphics or video editing? Not good at being a DJ? Then this contest is for you! Everybody can tell the tales. All good tankers should be able to tell the tanktales!

Rules and Regulations

• Only one submission per contestant is allowed;
• Each submission must not exceed 5,000 symbols;
• Each tanktale must include the following set of characters: Brave Tanker, Angry Arty, Dragon, 7 dwarves, Happy Leichtraktor, Shrek, Fairy Godmother, Holy Loewe;
• The tanktale must be titled;
• There are no restrictions on the genre of the tanktale;
• Tanktales in English only are allowed;
• The story should not violate moral, ethic, juridical norms, forum rules and EULA.

The winner will receive 6,000 gold, the player to take the second place will be awarded 4,000 gold and the prize for the third place will be 3,000 gold.

The contest starts immediately after the official announcement in the newsfeed is made and will be closed on August 14th at 23:59 UTC.

Disclaimer. According to Chapter 3 Section D. of WN Terms of Service: if you upload any photograph, video, or audio file to or through any WN Communication Feature, you grant to WN the non-exclusive, worldwide right to use, post, publish and display such material, without royalty or compensation of any kind, expressly waive any and all rights of privacy, moral rights or rights of attribution and integrity.

Attention! The Administration reserves the right to cancel or prolong the contest.

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P.S. To help ensure the competitions are fun and does not violate the game rules, forum rules or EULA, the contest section is strictly moderated. Only Contest Entries are to be posted in this thread, any discussion comments or text messages will be deleted and sanctioned. Discussion thread is here.

If you have any questions regarding the contest, please PM them to Vallter or Cheeka.

PZ4 in Komarin

             I had pz4. This tank on me, I do not play very well. Komar were in a map and there were 2 kV in us against the team was the most powerful tank mine. We were Team 2 also. Then I went to Team 2 instead of the flag protection. And prey (ie the unlucky tank) waited, came in anyway. I began to wait, come in anyway. Then came the T46 as I was ignoring him. then.Then came another tank that came to light, but then pz4 kv and could not decide what to do, and many others have not pz4'ü. But reduced the number of tanks. There was no hit points, but because I was attacked kv to get 35 shots worse job I had also had no bullets. At the end she lost the match

March of The Black Maus
In the land where tank is safe and peace has came after war, a brave tanker in his Panzer IV was born from Fairy Godmother and Holy Lowe. From his young years he showed other tankers how to fight enemy in case of war. After age of eighteen, as every tanker he had to pass test. Four Guardians lead to a secret tank. As he knew he won't be able to make trip alone he wanted to hire a platoon, but it was too expensive for him. He decided to go with his best friend which was happy Leichtraktor. They started off to unknown lands of TankLand. Meeting dragons and seven dwarves, they couldn't help their loss of Lady Tank that was missing they said:
-Mission more important is! Sorry we are for You but we need to be on move! There were non-ending war was happening between brothers. Through abandonded towns, villages, train stations, desertes and tundras, they were heading for final goal. They feared the beasts of battlefield. Destination of their journey was closer with every rotation of tracks and every drop of oil. When they came to the first guardian they feared the worse. Here he was... Mighty Angry Artillery. He was angry, angry on his battle brothers that they didn't help him, he died alone, protecting their most important treasure... The base. He supported them every second, but they didn't appreciate it. He saw travellers and shot in air, saying:
-You shall turn Your hull and drive away! You won't pass!
-Angry Arty! We hear'd the story! We are here for the treasure of glory! The mighty Shrek in his IS gave us the blessing!
-The test You must pass then! My battle brothers never crushed them. - And he pointed with gun at hordes of enemies - Defeat them for me, You must! Now go! And let them taste the failure!
They rushed as fast as they could... They splited up... But destroyed they got... So what is point in story of this? Don't be a noob? No... Teamwork is the best work player. So don't blame it on team when You will burn... Because mistake was your own.

mines

PzKpfw 38H735 (f): This tank is a map with the name of the match got to tell the mines now. This match maçıda kazanmam he had 15 bullets vardı.Ve. All games to match the much broader light tank that lasts for 2-3 minutes, is already thinking about it I decided to wait for things to go wrong, but I looked I was surrounded by them included in the game. Some time has passed but the bullet hit me over 3 tanks. But no one tank that was left, and its also a matter of time. No other team-mates came in and he ettilerr tank. He was a medium tank T2. And he was not the end.

The Journey

One day, the Brave Tanker has learned about the exist of a rumoured Happy Leichttraktor - a small tank that never turned sad.
He has asked the Holy Löwe, an old tank from Germany, what would the best route to it be. Yet, the Löwe said: "I may not help you mein kamerad.
The only one who knows where the Happy Leichttraktor stays is the Shrek." The Shrek. A rather young tanker, living in the caves beyond
the two maps - the Ruinberg and Prokchorovka - and finally, in the Mountain Pass. He was known for only driving Russian heavy tanks.

The Brave Tanker has jumped onto his ISU-152 and rode towards Ruinberg. While attempting to pass the town square, he has encountered a horrible sight
An Angry Arty has been shooting on his friend - the Dragon! He immediately rushed towards the Angry Arty, shouted "Load HE Rounds!" towards his loader.
He has precisely aimed onto the huge gun 210 milimeter gun of the GW Typ E - the Angry Arty. The whole time of the round's flight felt like a million years.
"Critical hit!" he could hear in his ears. The Angry Arty had it's gun broken in two pieces! A sudden chatter would be heard over the radio, about how Dragon,
and his precious T54, could've handled it himself, but thanks anyway. He agreed to join the Brave Tanker on his journey to see the Shrek.

Once they drove over Prokchorovka, the Fairy Godmother appeared. She didn't want to let our two brave pass! They have put their heads together to make a plan.
"I shall flank her, shoot her tank's engine up, and you will stay hidden in the bushes and use your big gun to finish her off!" said Dragon. But even a better plan
has arised in the Brave Tanker's head. "You will spot for me. I'll fire on a distance. There is no way you'd live againist that Patton of her's! I'll let you finish it though."
The Brave Tanker and his crew had hid the tank destroyer with a mighty 152mm ML-20SM gun in the bushes overlooking the plains where Fairy Godmother was. The Dragon has fired up his T54.

But something strange has happened! The Fairy Godmother got out of her Patton, and shouted at them: "You may pass. I'm glad to see you are such skilled tankers. Should you need me in the future,
just ask a tree for a help!" When they were out of reach, the Dragon asked "How would she know we need help if we ask a TREE?" Dragon asked. The Brave Tanker had his answer ready though - "She's a fairy. She knows everything."

When they finally arrived to the Mountain pass, the Shrek was already waiting on top of his IS7, surrounded by the Seven Dwarves, driving their BT-2s. He has already known of their intentions from the Fairy Godmother.
He didn't want to tell them, as long as they have not brought him a proof that they defeated the Angry Arty. The Brave Tanker asked a tree for help. Fairy Godmother was short to follow with her Patton tank.
She knew, and had been towing one of the Angry Arty's cannon's halves. "Here shall be your proof, Shrek." said the Dragon. "We have defeated that Angry Arty thing."

Only a thirty minutes later (And 30,000 Credits paid for ammunition and supplies in Shrek's Store), they were on the road again. They have been told that the nearby Steppes had a small cave near them.
However - once they have drove over the openings of the Steppes, a Maus tank has appeared out of nowhere shouting at them in horrible voice: "What are your INTENTIONS!??" he asked, aiming his huge gun at our two brave.

Brave Tanker did not feel any fear. "We want to see the Happy Leichttraktor. We come in peace." he answered. Suddenly, big door-like thing has opened in the Maus' front armour, and a lot smaller tank drove out - The Happy Leichttraktor!
"May I welcome you to the Steppes then, gentlemen" he said. The journey has been Succesfull.

And if the Angry Arty didn't return, they fought happily ever after.


Sidenote: Finally a contest in something I'm good at. By the way, the story has exactly 3,120 characters without spaces between words. 3,799 characters with the spaces.

It is called THE EPIC BATTLE FOR GOLD SWAMP

according to Word it contains 4979 symbols. Without spaces.

So, if you like, let me know. And... Enjoooy!!!



Once uppon the time, there was this swamp. It was favourite place of many tankers, because there was a little thing called Gold Stuff and after smoking this thing, tankist may just evolved into Happy Leichtraktor, which is an omnipotent being, capable of running throught Maus, leaving just a rubble.
Well, it was not that easy to collect this wonderfull weed, because in the swamp lived ugly creature called Shrek. He was big, he was ugly and he smoked Gold Stuff whole day, kicking his loyal Donkey around in old boxes of pizza and used soft wipes.

So, our hero, the Brave Tanker, was collecting this Gold, when suddenly a wild Shreck appeard.
"Yo, duuude, you‘re stealing my Gold. Get your filthy hands off, or I shall use your MS-1 as breakfast!" he screamd.
Brave tankist soil his armor, shot once and disappeard in cloud of exhaust gases. He was not that brave as you can see.
Despite bad luck, he managed to steal a litle of Gold Stuff and he was ready to smoke it, hoping he will became chosen Happy Loltractor, when suddenly, a flash of light appeared in the sky and a burning meteor...o oh, sorry, another story. A glorious Holy Loewe itself appeard. Brave tankist soiled his armor again and went down on his knees.
"Man, you will never accoplish anything with that!" spoke Loewe, pointing at poor little pipe of Brave Tanker. "Gimme that!" scream, took the pipe and smoke the Gold all by himself.
"Yeaah, that's the stuff... Anyway, there is one way how to defeat Shrek and get half of the Gold for yourself. You have to kill the fierce  Dragon of Malinovka and free seven dwarves he is guarding. They will forge you legendary Angry Arty and thus, you can blow that green son of a bad person throughout the swamp. If you do that, I will grant you half of the Gold Stuff and... eh... yeah and Fairy Godmother for a wife. That way I can finally get rid of her...!" said Loewe and disappeard, leaving but a map to Malinovka and stench of vodka and Gold.

And so, our brave tankist cleaned his armor and forged onward feared Malinovka. Nothing interesting happened during his journey. Well, he run over the Quantum Butterfly, thus saved the world from terrible hurricane, but noone ever find out. So it doesn’t count.

Finally, he had arrived to Malinovka and he was horrified. On the other side he saw a Dragon, looking towards him, but fortunatly, for some reason, he could not see further than 400 meters.
„Now what? If I go straight, he saw me and kill me with BL-10s 152mm of astounding pain and suffering... Oh, what an bad map!!!“ sighed the tanker.
Suddenly, something moved in the bushes and a terribly deformed tank stepped out.
„I am M3 Lee of Sparta! I pledge you an assistance! You see, there is a path throught the hill, you can use and flank the Leonidas! He will not last for long if you surround him!“ spoke the ugly tank.
„Man, what are you talking about? What Leonidas? I am after a dragon, dude!“ shouted Brave Tanker, once again cleaning his tank.
„Oh. Oh! Sorry man, wrong story again. But the path is true, you should try it. Bye.“ said the Lee and mysteriously dissapeared in the bush.

So, our Brave tanker took that route. And by the time he got to the top of the hill, he bravely cleaned his tank, cook himself a dinner and read Victor Hugo book. But, he took dragon completly unprepared. With scream „This is MS-ONEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!“ he rammed back of the fierce Dragon, making him completly harmless. And he fire shot after shot up his... well, let’s call it exhaust pipe... But things started to look pretty bad, as he was running out of ammo... Suddenly, pretty ugly woman with wings appeard and hit him in the head.
„I am Fairy Godmother. What the hell are you doing? Aim here!“ she said and pointed for one place on dragons back, still hitting Tanker in the head.
He got pissed, hit her with his last shell, loaded, aimed and shot. He hit Dragons legendary Ammorack, making him explode all over the place.
„Hooooooraaaay!“ he screamed and gave a big, friendly kick to unconcious, probably dead Fairy.
From houses 7 dwarfs emegred, screaming with joy. But, they got quickly silenced, when he told them what he wants. The Angry Arty!
„Nah, we’re too lazy and hungry to make you that....“ said dwarfs unissimo. Tanker got pissed again and kicked their gluteuses maximuses until they were screaming. Not of joy, of course.
„Ok, Ok, but still, we’re hungry!“ said only dwarf not complaining on his blog. So, Tanker gave them Fairy to cook. They were happy and after a while, they made him...
„I AM CALLED SCHOOL BUS AND I AM ANGRY! AND ARTY!“ said his legendary weapon. Brave tankist crapped in his armor again and, with Angry Arty, forge to Shreks swamp.

Again, nothing important happened during the trip.

Swamp was covered with gases, mostly those Shrek made. Brave tanker took a deep breath, too late realizing it’s not a good idea.
„Yo, green dude, Where are you?!“ he screamed. Nothing happened.
„OK then. I shall go scout him. When you see him, just smoke his buttock with some HE.“ He told to Angry Arty and went into clouds of swamp...
It was a looong game of hide and seek, but finally he found Shrek stoned as hell doing unspekable things to Donkey in some old house. Unfortunatly, Angry Arty could not shoot there. Tanker took another breath and entered...
„Kill meeeeee...“ whispered Donkey as he saw tanker. He puked, but got himself in the shape again and took a brave, but uneffective, shot at Shrek
„Let him be, you green jerk!“ he said bravely. Of course, Shrek got like superangry and start chasing him. And, lucky for tanker, he got from house out in the open.
„Now Arty, NOOOOOW!!!“ screamed the Tanker. Shrek stood in horror.
„Did you said Arty?“ he asked and then suddenly he expleded into million bloody pieces. Arty did his job and swamp was Tankers.

„Yo man, you did it! Half of the Gold Stuff is yours! But I could not find a Fairy Godmother...“ told Loewe, who appeard right behind Tankers back. And the Tanker said „Nevermind, she was probably ugly as hell“ and then he lived happily ever after.
THE END.

Battle of the Murmidian


Imagine a place, place where tanks live amongst people.

Where tanks are used for daily needs.

Yes mates i'm talking about Murmidian. Thats the kind of place where tanks are driven by simple people.

Just like me and you.

People use tanks to go to shopping, to go on the vaction , they use it for all sorts of things.

But...

there are ...

i don't really wanna tell their name, but i must...

There are other kind of tanks, that are not used by the "normal" people...

Theese tanks are driven by a race that doesn't co-op with humans. Those people are Dwarwes, they invented the whole new kind of tanks.

Tanks with paper armour but with the guns, guns so powerfull that can destroy anything thats needed.Dwarwes are the society that are leaden by some kind of president's.

They call them 7 dwarwes.

They established the whole race and they are the keepers of the ferocius Monster that is held in the deep forest just inside the Dwarwen city.

The monster's name is Dragon! Dwarws use Artillery, they don't have tanks.

They only use artillery.

Theres is the scary platoon of the artillery named "Angry Arty's".

They are the most fearfull platoon of all dwarwes.. And we begin our story.

One day , a Brave Tanker which name is Shrek drove around in his Happy Leichtetraktor.

He didn't relize that he entered the Dwarwen land.

Thats an big insult to Dwarwes...

The dwarwes saw that and they captured Shrek.

The word spread around so fast, faster then the forrest fire.

When the word got to the HOLY LOWE, he organized an army, army that will invade the Dwarwen empire and free our beloved Shrek.In the matter of days.

Tanks from the whole empire gathered. There where 1000 Mause's , 500 IS7 , 400 T30, 200 Objects and Jagdtigers.

They marched in the Dwarwen empire. Seizing teritory of the Dwarwes, Tank army soon reached the outskirts of the Dwarwen city.

Early in the morning fight began. T92's and Object's 261 soon started shelling the Tank army...

When the first line was defeated , they brought up the platoon, yes they called the "Angry Artillery"...

They un-mercifully killed dozens of our beloved tanks,but with the Russian bruttaly strong guns they suceeded to kill the famous platoon.

Eventually the front wall of the city was destroyed, but with many casulties on both side.

The rest of the Tank army invaded the city and reached the Forrest's where the Dragon lays.On the outskirts of the forrest was a tower, tower where the Brave tanker named Shrek was held. In the tower there where the 7 dwarwes.

Holy Lowe approched the 7 dwarwes and said to them "You leave this land forever , and don't come back.We will kill your Dragon and destroy your whole empire to revenge the kidnap of the Brave Tanker!"

Shrek got up in his Happy Leichtetraktor and they all marched into the nest, where the dragon was held!

The dragon was awoken and and he started to destroying Tanks.

Holy Lowe then reached for his Premium shells and shoot them into the sky , he shot 7 times.

Then the storm began.

Everbody stopped fighting.

They looked in the sky , sky was black, thuders soon start to crash, rain began!!!

And suddenly it all stopped, the clouds separated and then she came, ah what a beautifull sighting said The Brave tanker that was held in the Big Tower just at the outskirst of the forrest.

Fairy Godmother landed on the ground and slayed the dragon...

Holy Lowe sent some men to free the Brave Tanker named Shrek.

Then the Shrek plaged that he will be the keeper of the gun, the gun name was BL10 and it was mounted on his Happy leichtetraktor.

They all lived happy after....



Hope you like the story !

A Tale of Brave Tanker

Brave Tanker was a cheerful lad, hard to describe tho - in fact, nobody knew what he looked like, because for some strange reason he was invisible. Other inhabitants of the kingdom were invisible too, a fact that drove many a clothier to tears. But he didn't mind - all he cared about was his trusty steed named Tyger. Tyger was actually a Panzer II tank, named by its maker, godsmith Krupp during his 985th birthday. The result of this occasion was our poor Tyger and the fact that the godsmith's friends would never bring him any alcohol ever again, a thing Krupp would regret for many years to come. Tyger often wished upon the stars to grow up one day and to become a real Tiger tank, like he always wanted. Whenever the Tanker heard Tyger say that, he was always very sad he couldn't help his trusted friend - until one day, a weary traveller came to Brave Tanker's small depot.

The Traveller's Maus was in dire need of cleaning and repairs. Apart from being dirty, it was also apparent that the Traveller wasn't a very good driver. There were some red stains on the lower front armor, indicating that more than one unsuspecting pedestrian met his untimely end while hearing the Maus' rumbling and muted obscenities coming from inside the hull, cursing poor tank slit visibility. The worst thing, however, was this... thing, stuck in the threads. It was large and green - and that was about the only thing that the Tanker could say about it, because it seemed to be there for a while, stuck in the undercarriage. The Tanker reluctantly asked the Traveller what happened.

"You see", replied the Traveller "there was this nice swamp me and my boys used it for driving practice, but one day, some big green giant moved in with his family - Shrek he was called, or Shrak, I don't recall exactly - and he started pushing us around - don't go there, don't do that, watch that toadstool, bla bla bla... he even threatened to tie himself to a tree if we don't stop." "What happened then?" "Well... he tied himself to a tree and we didn't stop." "Oh..." "Yea well, after that, the family moved out and all... bad story, couldn't clean ol' Mausy here without a depot."  Whatever thoughts the Tanker had, he kept them to himself, as he carefully cleaned the Maus. He noticed one strange thing - on the back of the Maus, a Panzer IV plate was stuck. "Why is the plate there?" the Tanker asked. "Because the Maus used to be a Panzer IV, but the Wizard changed it!" explained the Traveller. Excited, the Tanker asked for details and as the Traveller recalled the journey, both Tyger and Tanker grew more and more excited. When they were done, they departed immediately. The journey was long - they met many odd characters: a Leichttraktor (who laughed for no apparent reason) smoking some strange-smelling herbs with 7 little dwarves in front of their cottage. They were offered the herbs too - Tyger tried and he didn't feel anything, until he saw 7 pink Elefant tanks floating around, singing Kumbaya. They also met a forgetful old fairy godmother - she claimed to have lost her tank in tall grass, blaming something called "spotting system". Neither Tyger nor Tanker knew what it was, but they spent several hours searching the bushes without finding anything and so they moved on, leaving the godmother with some combat provisions and chocolates Tyger found for some strange reason stashed in his compartment.

They also met foreigners - most were okay, but one was really angry artillery piece, speaking some strange language. "Good day to you, Sir" Tanker greeted the Priest, that was practically quivering with rage. "Omg wtf hax u nob", explained the artillery angrily. Not knowing what that meant, Tanker asked if they are near the Big Mountain, where the wizard was supposed to live. "Omg go spot nub" explained the arty. Tanker and Tyger shrugged and moved on.

They finally reached a big mountain. But there was a huge evil dragon! Tanker and Tyger attacked, but the small autocannon couldn't penetrate the hide of the beast! "Load high explosives!", yelled the tanker - and in a few seconds, the towering monstrosity was covered with small explosions. "Bloody zero damage criticals..." muttered the Tanker and ordered Tyger to aim between the beast's legs. Suddenly, dragon exploded in a huge ball of fire! Tyger and Tanker sighed with relief. "Looks like we hit it straight in his... ammo rack!" explained the Tanker.

With the road clear, they both entered a big cave, shining with pillars of light all over the place. In the middle of it, they found a big pedestal with something on it. "Holy shit!" gasped the Tanker. "Actually... that would be Loewe!" boomed a deep voice. "What do you wish of me?" "We wish Tyger to become a Tiger and to fulfill his biggest wish!" shouted the Tanker back, "but hurry please, because my character limit is at the end!" Holy Loewe turned Tyger into a Tiger and they all lived happily ever after, well, except for Shrek.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

There. 4999 characters (http://www.lettercount.com/) - excluding the title

.Those Happy Traktors.

Once upon a time, there once lived a village which had alot of happy leichtraktor, who were free to roam the land and come and go as they pleased, they were ruled by one almighty leader, the almighty holy loewe, however he was reffered to by his subjects as shrek.

Shrek was a truly great leader and rained his land with fairness and teamwork, with the help of his arty's nothing could come close to his village untill one faithful day......

there was a scroll with a prophecy that said there would be a time full of darkness, unfortunately this scroll never stated the date of this event, it only gave signs to lookout for, Shrek new the scroll well and what he forsaw sent a chill right through his core to his tracks, the prophecy was at hand, and what happened next, he found shocking.

his former allies, the arty's who helped him rein this land, had made a military coup against Shrek, while he escaped he saved one of the leichtraktors from the wrath of the arty's, he was baffled as to why his subjects would do this, as Shrek was perplexed over the situation, the small leichtraktor suggested they see a powerful IS known as the fairy godmother, as to figure out whatand why this had happened, they setup camp for the night near some bushes, and setup a tent using there camo net.....

     The next morning....

after having eaten some comabat rations and coca cola as refreshments they set off to find the fairy godmother who lived up in the mountains, however they got lost in the forest until the were at a small garage, the leichtraktor recognised the house and said to Shrek "this is the 7 dwarfs garage" immediately after this 7 MS-1's appeared from a mine nearby, the MS-1's were outside of Shreks realm and so did not know who he was and were rather hostile, but after lengthy negotiation and some chocolate the MS-1's welcomed them to their humble life, Shrek insisted to get the where-abouts of the fairy        god-mothers place  but the MS-1's also insisted that it was a lost cause untill the little leichtraktor bellowed "TELL US NOW" reluctantly the 7 ms-1'S relinquished the location of her where-abouts and after thanking the 7 dwarfs they once again set off but in the right direction....

Later that day, they finally arrived at the fairy godmothers house after perilously strafing through an anti-tank minefield,
once inside, they confronted the IS and after a lengthy complicated talk that is too long too discusss, she said this

"the answer to why this happened does not rely amongst the angry arty's, who could have not staged this large take over, no... it was something more sinister, something that took advantage of the arty's being unhappy,"

"the mighty maus was the cause of the take over, along with his dragon the KV"
Shrek and the little leichtraktor were wondering why the the dragon (KV) was a threat, but then they realised that the dragon must of had the TROLLOL gun, (152) or as the villagers call it, the derp gun....

after lengthy organisation, the 7 dwarfs, the fairy godmother, and the soon to be brave tanker, the little leichtraktor, their forces were small yes but they had tactics and teamwork on their side.

the day has come, the allied forces have arrived on the once peacefull village, there were black craters everywhere, the wood garages had been mostly torn apart and the inhabitants had been enslaved and forced to work with nothing to gain.

they charged on the battle field destroying everything they could see that wasn't friendly, shells rained everywhere and it was if the hand of god itself was raining on the allied forces, despite this they stood strong recieving minimal damage, once the village was free the 7 dwarfs and the fairy godmother went about securing the village and setting evreyone free.
the castle on the hill was the last obstacle, Shrek and the little leichtraktor struggled up the hill and once they arrived at the castle door....

the dragon crashed through the left wall and the almighty maus crashed through the wall on the right, they were trying to flank our heroes! Shrek fired his mighty gun at the maus taking his health down, the little lecihtraktor had driven off into the castle,meanwhile the Dragon with his derp gun fired at Shrek destroying his tracks and damaged him greatly, Shrek managed to clamber his strength and fired once more bringing his health down low, the dragon staring down the loewes gun fired and destroyed shreks gun, this time shrek could not fight back or move and both of them only needed one shot to finish eahc other, then all of a sudden the little leichtraktor appeared on the gaurd wall and destroyed the dragons track, he turned his turret around at the leichtraktor but at that moment shrek's gun and track were fixed and the feared dragon was now destroyed.

only the maus was left now as the arty's had either been destroyed by the dwarfs and the fairy godmother, or they had fled from battle as they felt they were outmatched.

suddenly the leichtraktor was hit, but miraculously survived, Shrek came to his aid, since the maus had been spotted, he surrendered and was perma-banned from the land.

          A few days later....

things were as they were before, Shrek was once a again the Holy Loewe, the village was repaired using toolkits they had stored, casualties were aided with med kits, those happy traktors were free once again.
.
and that little leichtraktor was not little anymore... he was a brave tanker

*Epilogue*

all of the allies who contributed to this revolutionary battle had recieved the top gun award, wittman's medal, scout, defender, invader... and the happy leichtraktor recieved the orlik's medal

hehe, those happy traktors.....

(end of story)

4,856 characters.
Happy reading

A Maus Tale
Have you ever wondered why the Maus tank is so big? Well I am going to tell you the story of how the Maus became so large.
Once upon a time, when Tanks began, the Maus was indeed a very small tank, in fact the A-20 was respectably large compared to it.
And every day the other tanks mocked him because he was so tiny  . He was very sad, then one day a Happy Leichtraktor came along   , as he was driving through Himmelsdorf he saw the Maus all by itself in the red base and drove towards him. “Why are you so upset”? Asked the Happy Leichtraktor, “Every one teases me because I am so small” replied the Maus. “I’m small like you” said the Leichtraktor “and people team kill me all the time, but because I am so happy I do not mind, try being happy and maybe you will feel better”.
So the Maus tried being happy but the teasing did not stop and he was still upset. As he was going to tell the Leichtraktor of the bad news some Angry Arty drove in his way, “the Leichtraktor told me you were having some trouble with the other tanks  ” shouted the Angry Arty “Maybe they will stop teasing you if you are Mean back to them   ".
So as the Maus drove away to be Angry he saw the Happy Leichtraktor , He then team killed the Happy Leichtraktor to try out being Angry, but it did not work, he felt guilty and decided he could not be Angry  .
Then the Brave tanker heard of the Maus and went to help him out. When he found the Maus he said “Why not be brave, stand up to the other tanks and say being small is not bad, say that size does not matter   ”
So he went to the other tanks to show them that he was Brave, but on his way he saw a huge dragon attacking them, Then the Maus knew that to show them he was brave he had to slay the dragon, so the Maus drove as fast as his small tracks could take him and fired at the dragon, but it just bounced off   . He knew that he had to find its weak spot and fast! The Maus drove underneath the dragon and shot it through its soft underbelly , The Maus was proud and as he went to boast to the other tanks the dragon fell on him, so the other tanks had to push the dragon off the Maus, but they could not manage it, they knew they had to find someone to push the dragon of, so they went to Prokorovka to find a being known as Shrek to free the Maus and they only laughed at him more . Shrek took pity on the Maus and told him he knew seven dwarves that might be able to help him.
So he searched over all the maps until he found the dwarves inside the windmill in Malinovka. He asked if they could help him and if they could make him bigger. So they worked and they worked until they were too tired to work any more, one of the dwarfs said “Look in this mirror and you will see yourself in a different way” and indeed he saw himself in a different way, he was hugely bigger than any other tank, but he was ugly, so very ugly   . He asked the dwarves if they could make him look like he used to but they said that they had used all their materials making him so big. So the Maus was still unhappy   .
On his way back he saw a golden shell lying half way into the ground, he shot it and a huge puff of purple smoke covered the Maus. As the smoke cleared he saw the Fairy God Mother flying in front of him. “You have been treated very badly by those nasty other tanks and I will give you a wish, it can be anything you like, but choose wisely as you will only get one wish”. “I want to look like a normal tank again” said the Maus and the fairy god mother swished her broken IS-7 gun in the air and POOF the Maus was the biggest tank in the game and he looked just like he was fresh from the factory! “Thank you" said the Maus and he raced off back to Himmelsdorf to see the other tanks   .
When he got back the other tanks looked in shock as he showed off his enormous size . “You're huge they all said” And he said “And you're tiny, smaller than the happy Leichtraktor” and so the Maus started to tease the other tanks like they teased him until no other tanks were happy. And no one liked the Maus, so every time he tried to talk to another tank they would drive away   . One day the Maus was driving along an old dust path when a voice came from above, “I am the Holy Loewe, and it has come to my knowledge that you have been very unpleasant to the other tanks, I know they were unkind to you but that doesn’t mean that you should not be nice to them” said the Holy Loewe “If you are mean to them again I shall take away your wish and you will be ugly forever” demanded the Holy Loewe “I am sorry and I will be nice once more” said the Maus. A few minutes later he saw the happy Leichtraktor stuck in a bog, so he used his enormous size to push him out, “Thank you" said the happy Leichtraktor and so the Maus went around doing good deeds until every tank was happy. And every one was friends.   And that was the story of why the Maus is so large.
The End

   Once upon a time there was a German tank family. Their youngest member was also the smallest and all of his friends made fun of him, but he never got angry. He loved his father's tales about the Brave Tanker trying to tame the Holy Loewe, it was even better than "The Dragon and the 7 dwarves" ( which was a very popular bed-time story in Warland ). He hoped one day he will become as famous as Holy Loewe and he could fight tank-tamers like the Brave Tanker, but his big brother, Angry Arty was always discouraging him and telling him that he couldn't kill a fly even with Vertical Stabilizer. Our little tank didn't care about what others said because he knew he was from noble descending, the same branch of marvelous German precision as The Holy Loewe himself !
   As the years passed, the small war machine grew more and more confident in himself, even though Angry Arty was always praised for his bravery and accuracy. Nobody actually cared about the smallest one, but his optimism grew bigger and bigger despite the dark times that were coming. As the price of petrol was rising higher and higher, the tanks feared the war will end ! And Warland with no war is just a land ! A random land of rusty unused tanks. The Fairy Godmother, the supreme authority in Warland that had known ,as she claimed, The Holy Loewe in metal and bolts (in flesh and bones), not just from legends said that unless a new Holy War Machine rises, Warland is doomed to eternal peace. She said that “ The one who shall be the bravest will rise”. Because of that, every brave tank, arty and TD were training hard and hoping to prove themselves.
   After a few months of trials, Angry Arty did not manage to convince Fairy Godmother that he was good enough to get her blessing, to be the new Holy War Machine and to continue the war in Warland. His little brother tried to prove himself, too, but of course he had no chance in front of the bigger better Tigers, Panthers and all the other tanks from the Feline Tank Family. In spite of that, our little tank was always helpful and with his tracks on the ground.
   As the peace was approaching, the Fairy Godmother was weakened by the lack of gunshot sounds and twisted metal. She sat there alone in her premium hangar coughing up oil and praying for a new Holy War Machine. The entire tank population was worried the peace, and only our little tank decided to go and ask her why couldn’t he be a hero. But nobody was allowed in her there. As the little tank had nothing better to do, he sneaked passed the big Maus guardians and went into the hangar. There he saw the Fairy Godmother sit in pain, so he went to her : “ Fairy Godmother, what happened to you ?”. “I am weakened by the upcoming peace and I don’t think I will survive”. “ But you are the Fairy Godmother, you knew The Holy Loewe himself !” . “ Yes, but I’m not immortal. You see, I am powerless in case of peace unless there is a Holy War Machine”. “ So why don’t you give your blessing to a brave tank? There are lots of them”. “ Only the ones that are truly brave can understand what bravery is…” the Fairy Godmother said, moaning in pain. Having seen her condition, our little tank went outside and picked a fight with the guardians, hoping the sounds of battle will make her feel better. He was quickly caught but the Fairy Godmother came outside : “ How dare you come here uninvited and pick a fight with two Mauses ? “, she said with obvious vigor. “ At least you feel better now, Fairy Godmother, as I can see”  answered the little tank with a smile. “ Very well. You have proven yourself brave enough to be the next Holy War Machine”. “But I could have picked a fight with your guardians, too” said Shrek from the crowd gathered by the noise. “He isn’t brave because he picked a fight, he is brave because he came here to confront me when clearly no one else had the courage to do it. I was never sick, it was just a test to find the next Holy War Machine and it seems he passed it. And after being caught he still could see the bright side of things, and that’s why I shall call him <<Happy>>… excuse me, what tank are you ?”.
“I’m a Leichtraktor”, our little tank proudly answered. “ I shall give him my blessing and from now on this is The Holy Happy Leichtraktor!”

I hope it's a good enough story because I'm not a native English speaker. Anyway, it has about 4272 characters.

Hey Guys, here's my story.
Hope you like my strange kind of humour.
924 words, 4971 symbols with spaces (4086 without) by the way, so you don't have to count yourself  

The legend of tanker Gustav

Once upon a time there was a brave tanker and his name was Gustav. In fact, he wasn't that brave, but rather stupid - so he thought attacking a bunch of enemies all alone was a good idea. Others called his actions brave and he liked to believe he was.
Gustav loved his M3 Lee and thought it was the best tank ever. One day he drove it to a place he never had been to and met 7 dwarves in front of a supermarket. „Hey there, how are you today?“ Gustav asked. „Hey, we're the 7 dwarves and we are goint to break into this supermarket, because we need Beer. Wanna join us? You look like a brave tanker.“ A dwarf said. „Um... well, actually not.“ Gustav answered. „Whatever, we'll burn the door open with that giant laser over there now. Start it!“ The dwarf shouted, and another one replied: „IMMA CHARGIN MAH LAZER!!!“
When the laser started burning the supermarket's door, the alarm started and a dragon arrived. In large letters the word 'SECURITY' was printed on the dragon's shirt.
„Burglars, huh? BURN!!!“ The dragon shouted and started spitting fire. When the dwarves were roasted medium rare, he stopped and mounted a sign that said 'Roasted dwarves – 1 $'.
Gustav wondered where the dragon got that sign so suddenly.
A giant, green, disgusting ogre arrived. „Hi Gustav, I'm Shrek.“ He said. „What the.. how do you know I'm Gustav?“ Gustav was really astonished. „The fairy godmother over there told me.“ He pointed at a fairy godmother. „Makes sense.“ Gustav admitted. „And how do you know I am Gustav?“ He asked the fairy godmother. „Well, I've been stalking you for a while.“ The fairy godmother replied. „And by the way, I am Laura and its my hobby to turn machines alive. Like I'll do with your M3 Lee now.“ Laura swang her wand and Gustav's M3 Lee became alive.
„Finally, I'm free!“ He shouted, kicked Gustav out and drove away.
„Um... well sorry for that, I'm usually better – just look at our friend the dragon Spitfire here. You know why he's called Spitfire? Because he was a spitfire untill I turned him alive. The only thing left from his days as a spitfire is the fact, that he can spit fire.“ Laura said.
„And how is that gonna bring my M3 Lee back?“ Gustav asked. „Not at all. Spitfire? I'll take 2 roasted dwarves, please.“ Shrek answered.
„Man, you're a crazy bunch. I'll go away now.“ Gustav said and went on.
He came to a croud of people praying to a huge golden tank. The people were really different from each other, they spoke differently, looked differently, but they all had one in common: They owned a lot of money and carried bags with dollar symbols on them. „Guys, what are you up to?“ Gustav asked. „We pray to our idol, the holy Loewe and sacrifice all our money to him.“ A guy in a suit answered. „And why would you do that?“ „Because he's holy. And golden. And we have so much money, but no reallife.“ „Isn't a  tank made of gold a stupid idea?“ „This one is just a golden statue, not for fighing. But to talk with the real holy Loewe, you need to wait in front of his temple untill you're let in and there are so many people waiting that the approximate waiting time currently is 12 years.“ „Aww, too much for me. I guess the holy Loewe counts as appearing in this story without personally talking to him.“ Gustav said to himself and went on. After a little walk he came to an angry Hummel. „Hey man, you look kind of angry. What's up?“ Gustav said. „Yeah, I'm angry! My name is Arty and noone accepts or respects me. I am artillery and all those tankers hate me for that. Just because I can destroy them from far distance! If they can't take that, they shouldn't battle me!“
Arty answered. „Um... yeah...“ Gustav closed his jacket fast to hide his 'I hate Artillery'-Shirt. „And look how they all pray to that Loewe! It's so ridiculous. I'll destroy thet stupid temple now. They'll see what they get for disrespecting me!“ And Arty launched a shell. „Um yeah, have your revenge. I'll see you later.“ Gustav said and ran away.
After about 5 minutes Gustav reached a blooming meadow. A happy Leichttraktor was on it, enjoying the flowers. „Hey little guy, you sure look happy.“ Gustav said. „Well I am and uh... hey, won't you ever call me small again!“ „Uh, but you are. You're a Leichttraktor. Ain't that Tier 1?“ Gustav didn't notice how annoying he was. „Stop that!“ The happy Leichttraktor wasn't that happy anymore. „Just leave me alone and let me enjoy my flowers!“ „I'm Gustav, the brave tanker and I'm not scared by a crappy Tier 1!“ „What the – you don't even have a tank!“ The Leichttraktor started to get angry. „And you ARE not even a tank. I laugh at you!“ Now Gustav had gone too far. The Leichttraktor moved towards Gustav, opened his mouth and ate him with a single bite.
This was the end of our so called brave tanker Gustav, who had forgotten the most important golden rule for tankers:
Never make the Traktor angry.

The end.

So that was it. Hope you enjoyed it.  

Steel vs Magic

One day in the land of fairy tales, Fairy Godmother noticed that kids are loosing interest in fairy tales and cartoons in general. She was greatly upset by this finding so she looked at her crystal ball and she found a reason for this - kids (and adults as well) became more interested in World of Tanks. But since Fairy Godmother didn't know much about tanks, she appointed her bodyguard Shrek and 7 dwarves (who contrary to popular belief weren't miners, but in fact they were skilled ninja mercenaries) to kidnap one of those tanks for her, so she could examine what is so attractive about them. She looked in her crystal ball again and she found that Brave Tanker has a lot of tanks in his garage, so she sent Shrek and dwarves to him. And so one night when Brave Tanker went to sleep, Shrek and dwarves broke in his garage and took first tank they saw. Unfortunately for them it was Angry Arty, the most unpopular guy in garage, nobody liked him because he didn't actually fought like the rest of the tanks but he cowardly bombarded the tanks that can't see him (this led to hate towards him and also was a main reason of accusations of Arty being gay, although those accusations were never confirmed), and all of this made Arty very angry because it's not his fault he fights the way he fights, it's in his nature. In the morning tanks noticed that Arty is missing, but no one cared, they didn't like him anyway, only the Happy Leichtraktor, often nicknamed Loltraktor, who never understood why the guys are hating Arty so much (because the devil known as Matchmaker never put Loltractor in suffering battles against artys) was concerned what happened to Arty. So the little Loltraktor went to Brave Tanker to inform him that Angry Arty is missing. Brave Tanker went outside and found traces of Artys tracks on the grass and decided that he will follow the traces to find out where is Arty. He asked his tanks who will help him in his search for Arty, but they all refused, except for Loltraktor. Meanwhile Fairy was disappointed when she saw Angry Arty - how can someone replace the beautiful fairy tales with this ugly, repulsive steel bucket like Arty? She was very furious and she ordered the Dragon, who worked as a blacksmith, to melt down Arty and make something useful of him, maybe a casserole or a kettle. The Brave Tanker followed the tracks and they led him to the Fairy Godmothers castle. He and his Happy Leichtraktor managed to break down the portcullis of a castle and they confronted Fairy, Shrek and dwarves. Tanker and Loltractor put up a hell of a fight to save their friend Arty, but they were outnumbered, and the little Loltractor was unable to harm big bully like Shrek who even let Loltraktor to shot at him and mocked at Loltraktor because of his weak hits. Shrek then approached to Brave Tanker with intentions to destroy his little tank, but then earth started to tremble, the walls of the castle fell down, and big shadow appeared - it was Holy Loewe, a 200 tons Maus tank, he at first didn't wanted to help in rescuing Arty (because he had really bad experiences with artys in the past), but he couldn't just leave his friends to go alone against unknown enemy. Holy Loewe then swinged with his big gun and knocked the Shrek out, and when dwarves saw this they got scared and they ran away (no ninja is a match for 200 tons of steel). Fairy knew that she is gonna be defeated, so she casted a spell to disappear. Tanker, Loltractor and Loewe then entered the forge where the Dragon was just about to melt Arty, he took a deep breat and was seconds away to blow fire at Arty but Loewe aimed and fired from his 12,8cm gun and single-shoted the Dragon. The whole tank company then returned home. Angry Arty was so grateful, that he promised that he will go on a training to become a Tank Destroyer.

The End.

"Dark Passenger"
Far, far away, that was a sunny day in June, 2011 for brave tanker Brian, who had his own red Heavy tank called "Virgin". Like always, he drove to firing ground with his tank to met friends from army. In the half way he saw a man who wanted to get free ride. Brian never pick up strangers, but in that time he decided to stop, because a man had on his shirt two words: Holy Loewe. Our Tanker was shocked, because "Holy Loewe" was an mysterious clan of the best Tankers in history ( The name clan brought from the best tanker in history called General Arnold Loewe and in place of his name putted word “holy”, because he helped the people during the war). He stopped and ask a question:
- Are you a member of "Holy Loewe"?
- Am I look like our president Winston Shrek with stinky feet and big belly? Of course that I am a member, but now I have nothing except beautiful memories - Stranger responded.
Brian was very exciting and invited him to a tank. During the conversation Brian found out, that the stranger called Captain James Taylor, he is the last living from clan " Holy Loewe" and he wanted to go to the "secret mountains" to find a mysterious guy called "Happy Leichtraktor", because he need to stop the most dangerous SPG in this times called "Angry Arty". Brian was a little confused, because he knew, that Leichtraktor was a very weak tank in World War II and it is so funny to called someone like that. Captain Taylor told the story, that "Happy Leichtraktor" is one in a kind, because inside this guy is occult a Fairy Godmother and she knows how to destroy the "Angry Arty". Furthermore, Captain Taylor knew where were the secret mountains, but he needed a help, because the cave, where is a Fairy Godmother is protected by scary and powerful Dragon and the only way to kill the dragon is a bullet from heavy tank with special mixture and this mixture belong to Captain Taylor. He had this mixture from his Commander, who had hope that Captain Taylor can destroy "Angry Arty" in the future.
Brian was scared in the beginning but he decided to help and they drove straight to the "secret mountains". Like Captain Taylor said, they saw on the highest peak a cave and in front of the entrance stood a horrible dragon. Captain spread a mixture on the bullet, loaded it, Brian got a target and BEAMM! Dragon was hurt in his heart and exploded on a small pieces. Finally, the road to a "Happy Leichtraktor" was clear. They left the tank and went inside the cave. Meanwhile In Brian's city there was a terrible attack from "Angry Arty". It smashed a lot of buildings and destroyed all in his sight. Brian got the text message on his phone and was really angry. They ran so quickly to the "Happy Leichtraktor" and killed him. That was the only way to release the Fairy Godmother. She told them that she will help them for rescue her. They told her everything and she got only one way to stop "Angry Arty" - small, magic bombs, who can only be carry by ancients creatures : the famous 7 dwarves and if they sneak back to the SPG it is a chance to putted the bombs in strategic places on the SPG and it will be destroyed.
Our heroes were very happy to find the way to kill SPG. They only thought about a way to get an attention of SPG to get a chance to put the bombs behind it. Brian suggested that they must be face to face with SPG and sacrifice his tank to get more time to putted the bombs, when SPG will be reloaded his gun. To do this, they decided to employ a kamikaze warriors, who can die for a good reason. Moreover, they planned to attack SPG in the night on the field next to Brian's city. In the same time, SPG get information about where Captain Taylor was last time, because he was the last to kill by him and he found out, that Captain Taylor is in the Brian's Tank and there was no other looks like this tank and he waited in the Brian's city to destroy them.
One hour later Brian and Captain Taylor reach the city and Brian said "Tonight is the night". They left the tank and ordered to one of the citizen to go to the SPG and tell, that he saw the Brian's tank on the field. SPG get a decoy and drove to the field. Our heroes were waiting for him into the forest , next to the field. 30 minutes later they saw a huge SPG climbed on the top of the field. SPG saw the tank and shot it. The tank was exploded and Brian had a tears in his eyes.
Suddenly they saw a dwarves who were sneaking behind a SPG. They putted bombs on it and ran away. In 20 second Brian and Captain Taylor saw the biggest explosion in their life. They quickly went to thank the dwarves, but they all gone somewhere and our main heroes was very disappointed, but happy, because they live and they rescue a lot of people. They never forget a help from small creatures. They became a friends and with other friends of Brian fight on the firing grounds. They had hope to met a dwarves in the future, when world will need help again. All looks fine until…

The end.

4963 characters with spaces.  

4937 characters

"Don’t underestimate the teleporters”
In a land of Campshire, inside the mighty Panther II, was the Brave Tanker named Gregory. He always kept smile on his face, probably because of the all girls he saw at Happy Leichttraktor's Parade, celebrating the 1,000th kill of the Happy Leichttraktor, the top one warrior, who as the name suggests, only uses a Leichttraktor. The today’s battle was to be fought in a scary looking place of Campinovka, west of El Campuff and east of Campshire. Holy Loewe was the first enemy they had to fear. It was operated by 7 dwarves. Victor, the Loader, decided to use fireworks at him. So they put a bunch of fireworks into the gun, bought previously at Shrek's Ammu-Nation, who said that they’re the best against the Angry Arty's such as PEACH-8, MARIO-51, and LUIGI-261. Luckily, the fireworks hit one of the dwarves. The injured dwarf cursed loudly and a lot. The team was able to hear everything.
- YOU FAIRY GODMOTHERS!, I WILL KILL YOU ALL!, HEY OVER HERE!, OFFICER DOWN, OFFICER DOWN!, WHERE IS MY TNT?!
- This isn't Minecraft, don't drink Boomshine Whisky again. - said the other dwarf.
The team was laughing their asses off, but for a very big cost. Timor, the Driver, accidentally pushed a button called "Teleport".
- Oh shit, we forgot to remove this from the beta tests! - said Timor.
After a few minutes, they landed on some unknown land. Then they heard a loud BOOM!
- What the hell was that?! – screamed Timor.
- It was a pistol with HE's, we're not in a British tank, don't panic. - answered Gregory as always, with a cold voice.
- Damn it, the tracks are destroyed, where's Victor?
- Under your asses, hahaha! - laughed Victor.
- That wasn't funny Victor. - said Gregory.
- It wasn't funny either when you scared me, that we didn't kill Leichttraktor with 1% remaining health with HE's.
- C'mon it was a long time ago.
- Go track yourself, Gregory.
Gregory replaced the tracks very quickly, so they begun to explore the island. They were travelling in circles, because Gregory couldn’t concentrate on the road, and he couldn’t stop his comrades talking. After about 5 hours Timor discovered something on the island.
- It's an ammo rack!
- It’s not for our tank, it's for a French tank - said Gregory.
- French tank with ammo? LOL.- Victor laughed.
- Don't laugh at French people.
- Why not?
When suddenly…
- Look, two arty’s coming from behind! - noticed Gregory.
- Oh shit, it’s LUIGI-261, and MARIO-51, the Angry Arty’s! - Timor said.
- Use fireworks, as Shrek said!
Sadly, the fireworks didn’t work, but the Angry Arty’s pulled a white flag above them, so the team ignored them from now on.
- Stupid French people, when will they learn that you can push the button near the gun to shoot? - said Victor.
Suddenly a wild T-54 appeared from above.
- RUN! - screamed Victor.
- You were laughing at French people, now you act like one of them? – reminded Timor.
- STFU and shoot - said Gregory.
Thankfully they killed T-54 as it had the worst gun available.
- What kind of team they are, that they can’t acquire a normal gun for this tank? – questioned Timor.
- This is not important, we need to get out of this island. - said Gregory.
- Maybe I press the Teleport button again?
So they did.
- Wooo! Eh! Why am I hearing Nickleback songs? - said Victor.
- U listen to Nickleback songs? - Gregory was curious.
- That was the secret I was talking you about at the Happy Leichtraktor’s Parade.
- Where are we?
They landed at their hometown Campshire.
- Peace at last - said Gregory.
- Hey, where's Victor? – Timor again found Victor missing.
- Check under the tank.
Timor checked but he wasn’t there.
- Finally this sherm-head is gone.
- What did you say Timor?
- Nothing, nothing at all.
- Where is he then?
- Maybe he is still at the island?
Sadly, he was still there. To make it even worse, those 7 dwarves were also there.
- Hey, you want some potions? - said the previously injured dwarf.
- If they would make killing Maus with one shot possible, sure. – agreed Victor.
Sadly the potions were toxic and the Victor lost his consciousness, so the dwarves stole his ID and change the names on it, so they could now show to their boss, that they have 1000 Steel Wall's.
At the same time, Gregory, and Timor, were talking about the great things the Victor did.
- I will always remember when he accidentally launched an HE, when he was checking his hair, and killed 2 Maus’es.
- That was some crazy Tier 11 maneuver.
- I know man.
Gregory and Timor decided, that they would quick the navy, because fighting without Victor will not be same anymore, mainly because Victor always did all the work for them.
And what about Victor himself?
Well he was still alive. He used his firefighter skill to remove potions from his body. Later he was married to the prettiest and the strongest woman dwarf named the Dragon, who operated whole E-100 by herself. Together they were a fantastic team, killing campers, and arty’s from 900m. If only they wouldn’t met T95…
FIN

this is my tank tale:

Once upon a time…

The constitutional monarchy of Germania had been at war with the Republic of Sovieta for over 10 years now…but the end was in sight. Both sides were exhausted and demoralized by the long conflict. The forces of Germania were led by a tanker known only as the ‘Fairy Godmother’. From her E-100 she, if a ‘she’ at all, ruled as a ruthless commander who sent  hundreds to their grave just to gain a mile on the battlefield. The forces of Sovieta were lead by none other than a commander named  Vladimir Shrek, who drove his IS-7 into battle. He was a passionate man and was well known for his battlefield brilliance. Both sides fought with their deity at their sides. The people of Germania had faith in the ‘Heiligen Löwe’, while the people of Sovieta believed that ‘Svjatejšij L’vev’* would assist them in the conflict. Because contact between the two nations was severely limited, no-one really knew that they actually served the same deity…the Holy Lion.

Over the past months, Sovieta had developed a cunning plan to invade Germania and kill the Fairy Godmother in order to disrupt the chain of command. Shrek ordered his top tankers, ‘Dragon’ and ‘7 Dwarves’ to handpick three others for the mission.  It was going to be a one-way trip, but the soldiers knew their duty.

Thanks to her extensive spy network, the Fairy Godmother had gotten wind that Shrek was planning something. She  took no chances and decided to plan a counter offensive. Her tank ace, ‘Brave Tanker’ was already deep behind enemy lines, so she had to rely on her other troops. She summoned her second in command ’Angry Arty’, a man known for his ill-tempered nature, and planned a vile plan to stop Sovieta and kill commander Shrek. Angry Arty proposed the use of the ‘Happy Leichtetracktors’, a battalion of rookies in Leichtetraktors, to create a diversion. The enemy would be distracted by the wave of rookie tankers so that, with the help of the Holy Loewe, they could strike on the other front and create a breach in Sovieta’s defenses to overwhelm their major stronghold within days.

Both commanders were on edge, ready for an attack at any time. They didn’t sleep and continued to struggle with the idea that the enemy might have some devious backup plan in store.

‘Brave Tanker’ was Germania’s best tanker. He was a man feared by the enemy and respected by his own troops. He was a brave soldier who had defied the odds on more than one occasion, despite the Fairy Godmother’s ruthless orders to take no prisoners and shoot on sight. ’Brave Tanker’ had been undercover in enemy territory for months now and he had successfully infiltrated the main tank hanger. It didn’t shock him when he saw dozens of IS and KV variants stored in the hangar. He looked at the tanks with disgust, preferring own his King Tiger. He secretly attached explosives to the tank’s engines so that when they were started to tanks would explode.

‘Dragon’ and ‘7 Dwarves’ went though the personnel files of some of the veteran tankers in Sovieta’s army. After some searching they selected ‘TD’, ‘Matroesjka’ and ‘Beetee’ for the operation. Shrek had granted them access to every tank in the Sovieta arsenal, but they settled on four T-34’s and a KV-1 so they would attract little attention from the enemy. As the tanks rolled out of the hanger, ‘Dragon’ briefed his troops on the mission.

This conflict would go into the history books as a very special chapter about this bloody war…

The following morning the ‘Fairy Godmother’ ordered the assault. This time they would destroy the enemy, she was sure of it. Vladimir Shrek ordered a counter offensive to stop the ‘Fairy Godmother’s’ attack and draw attention away from his sneak attack.

Then, suddenly, just before the two forces clashed, a bright ray of sunlight came down from the sky. Both sides stopped in their tracks and crews stepped out of their vehicles to see this miracle. From the heavens a single armored behemoth descended. It was the Holy Lion. Across the battlefield soldiers dropped to their knees and averted their eyes. When the tank had finally set its tracks on the ground a single woman stepped out of the vehicle. When she spoke, everyone could hear their own native language. “I am the Holy Lion. I’ve come to stop this conflict before it will destroy you all. Heed my words and cease this violence. You are all brother and sisters.” she said to the soldiers. Then a bright flash of light engulfed the battlefield and the armored vehicle was gone. Not a single shot was fired after that…the soldiers embraced each other and from that day forward the nations of Germania and Sovieta were allies. ‘Fairy Godmother’ and Vladimir Shrek signed a peace treaty. ‘Brave Tanker’, ‘Dragon’ and ‘7 Dwarves’ became brothers-in-arms and served both nations until their retirement. the ‘Happy Leichtetraktor’ battalion was saved and dismissed from service. ‘Angry Arty’ forfeited his military career and became a priest of the Holy Lion. And so, peace reigned the lands…

“…HEY! Michael! Wake up! Quit your day dreamin’ and load the next shell, we got a StuGIII on our six!” commander Knox yelled. Private Michaels snapped out of his imagination and loaded the next shell. “…if only this war could be solved like that…” he thought…

(*I used an online translator to translate into Russian and the wiki to translate from the Cyrillic alphabet to the Roman alphabet…I hope it worked. Holy Lion --> святейший львев --> svjatejšij l’vev)

I hope you like it! (4353 symbols)

The Dudebros

There was this dude called Froid. Froid was born in a village of Malinovka. Malinovka was a small town with no more than 30 residents. Everyone in Malinovka was part of a tribe and loved to chat with the other people. The elder of the village was called Shrek. He was an old man with a golden voice. He cared about everything that happened in the town of Malinovka. In fact he had lived in Malinovka for his whole life. The person Shrek really cared about was Froid. He was ready to die for Froid if he needed to.
     One day a dangerous dragon attacked Malinovka village! The dragon was called "cutesnugglypinkiepuffybunnybuddy" but people just called it the evil dragon... The dragon raided the whole village and burned the buildings to the ground. That's when the tribe left Malinovka and headed east to safer place. Froid took a final look to the burning homeland. He decided. He will kill the evil dragon-!

The meeting
After weeks of travelling the tribe arrived to Ruinberg.
"Holy Loewe!" Froid said when he stared to the destroyed buildings. Froid knew that the dragon had been there, but since the dragon was gliding around the world at the very moment, they decided to camp in. The city wasn't completely empty though... There was a small cottage on the edge of the city. Shrek was heading towards the cottage, when a group of 7 dwarves came out.
-Is teh dragohn gone alreadyh?
-Who's that old man staringh at ush?
-Why ish all teh rum goneh?!
Shrek carefully asked what had happened since he wanted to ensure the dwarves were friendly.
-WHAT THE **** HAS HAPPENED HERE?!  
The dwarves seemed a bit confused but then they answered:
-A bigh dragonh!
-Red skinh!
-Hot Flamesh!
-Barbecueh!
After receiving the necessary and useful information Shrek invited the dwarves to join their tribe. So they continued towards the hut of Fairy Godmother.

The hut (hut HIKE!)
Although cutesnugglypinkiepuffybunnybuddy had fried nearly the whole world, one place was still untouched: The hut (hut HIKE!) of Fairy Godmother.
Since "Fairy godmother" is waay too long name to type, I'm calling her FG. (I'm also saving symbols...) So FG knew everything what was happening around the world. She told the current tribe that Froid was ment to slay the evil dragon. How original... The hero was supposed to find a tank. Froid knew exactly the perfect tank to choose. So he walked to the nearby tank shop (lol wtf) and bought a tank.
-Awesome! "Happy leichtraktor"...  
Shrek also had some savings and he chose his super-duper tank.
-Hmm... Smelly Slugger, Angry Arty, Dirty Pershing or Dragon-slaying Sherman... I think i choose angry arty!
So shrek and Froid drove around the world looking for the dragon.

The Dragon
After  a while our heroes arrived to Draconian town. THE evil dragon lived on the bottom of a big pit. Froid had some problems getting down. So he decided to get the dragon up. The lazy pants Froid fired his leichtraktor cannon and so the dragon flew on top of the pit... The dragon immediately fried our not so brave tanker Froid.
-NOooooOOoooO! *Cough*! Froooooooid!  
Shrek was raging horribly after the leichtraktor disappeared into the flames. Shrek took a shot with his 180mm gun and the shell flew right through the dragons chest. And the dragon was slain by Shrek! Surprise! After all that Shrek returned to Malinovka and rebuilt it...

THE END!   Hope you liked the story and my special adds on it with some humour.  There should be about 3500 symbols... PS. The title has NOTHING to do with the story

Trouble with Evil Bigfoot

In a land of fairy tale, there was a Tanker – he was brave. As he drived, through swamps and bogs, he found mr. Shrek carrying sack of hedgehogs. Tanker asked: „For what this burden?“. „For a dinner, you silly human… I came from distant land to get some food in hand. Beacouse in my country there is an Angry Arty.“, continued Shrek loudly, but very sadly. That Arty stole all their food, it called itself Evil Bigfoot. As it traveled it got many slaves, including 7 Dwarves, Dragon and Bill Gates. And now big Shrek almost cry, that he has no chance to try to save his beloved country and live in peace on his county. „Don’t worry“, says Brave Tanker, „I’ll help you, just tell where to go further“...
And our hero went on journey, soon he’ll shot bad enemy. With his HE-shells, obviously, arty has no armor, clearly. When he had almost passed half of  path, he see Fairy Godmother reading some book about math. She quickly rised and swinged her arms. What‘s going on? What magic? Whirl our tanker and looks tragic. But what a surprise, what a fun, he sees his target, flew in wind like from a fan. „Good hunting“, the Godmother told, waved her hand and hastly ran out.
„Who are you???“, sound above trees. „It’s me, fearless panzer“, tanker greets, „I came to blast you with no fear, so defend with all your gear.“ Our tanker is realy forceful, but what he saw next he found as baleful. Oh my god – tier 12 arty, thats bad, he need strong party. But there is no one around, only Happy Leichtraktor getting drugs and drunked. „OK, whats next? I’ll shoot before it tells any bad text!“, thinked our galant, and shooted very razant. But Arty only laughted, beacouse it wasn’t at all hurt. Now it just commands its slaves, to get that little hero of his face.
So the tanker fought long and hard, with this army of so-called „Laird“. I will not tell you all this story, beacouse it is a bit draggy. Only thing you need to know is that Tanker played well his role. He knocked out them all and locked in wagon, only one enemy remains, it’s just a Dragon. Dragons bad luck that tank is from steel, his fire breath has no impact, nothing real. Tanker’s srikes got him quickly. And nowgo for bad arty, to get him promptly.
But now Tanker is aware, that his Tiger can’t get him fair. And so he pray to his only god, to Holy Loewe, the one beloved. His prays were answered soon, Loewe shows himself behind the moon: „Don’t worry my german friend, I’ll help you with my holy hand. Look now to your magazine, you have premium ammo and now imagine – one shot to his back, and he’s a piece of wreck!“. „Thanks my lord, great thanks. You are the greatest of tanks“, shouts tanker to the moon, he will win, but not soon.
A great struggle has come to field, Brave Tanker against arty – strong and weird. All shots from arty has gone aside, but tanker can’t get to his back, only on side. But suddenly, what luck, arty is stuck. It bashed to unimaginable object, to Leichtraktor, it’s simply perfect. Tanker has chance to finish it all, but he don’t shoot, he just call: „You’r busted Angry Arty, surrender or find funeral party!“.
And that’s the end of this tale, arty is knocked down and discombobulate. All its slaves got to their tales and Shrek has his dinner for Fiona and our winner. They celebrate so much and well, it was hard, but now – farewell.
I hope you enjoyed this story, next time I’ll tell another, don’t worry!

“Hero of Ruinberg”
Long, long time ago... There was a Brave Tanker called Shrek. He fought for glory and fame in his unstopped tank called Happy Leichtraktor. One day he was just walking throught the big and old city called Ruinberg. It was ruined by war and powerful Dragon which died long time ago, after World War I. Now the city is beautiful, because it was rebuilded by 7 Dwarves. It was silent in the centre of town and our hero was whistling his favourite melody. Suddenly he saw enemies trying to destroy guards. Shrek ran to his tank as fast as he can, but enemies were faster… They destroyed Happy Leichtraktor with their powerful tank destroyer-AT-1. Tears fell down… Commander of this tank went out and shout:
-Hey, you… I won’t kill you Brave Shrek… Only if you will help me destroy this town of German Nazists.
-No way!-said crying Shrek-This is my town and I will die only trying to defend it.
-So, I’m glad to tell you that YOU will die here.
Commander went back to his tank, turned back and only smiled… Shrek loked above buildings and saw something in the sky. Was it a bird? Was it a Superman… Nevermind… It was a ghost of the same dragon which destroyed this town some years ago. He landed behind AT-1, destroyed it and said:
-Brave Tankser, you will become a hero saving this town. I give you a power to stop the enemy and help your nation win this mad war.
-Thank you. What am I suposted to do?
-You must fight against their tanks, but you don’t have any tank or crew so I give you Holy Loewe. This great tank is unstoppable and nobody can destroy it. You must use it to win this battle.
-Thank you again great Dragon of Ruinberg!
Hero started immediately in his brand new tank. His first mission was to capture the flag in the centre of town. There was a wolfpack of T-54-the most irritating tank in history. Holy Loewe has powerful gun using magic shells which can penetrate everything, even T-54’s front armor. T-54s were no problem so Shrek destroyed them very fast. As he captured the flag, Fairy Godmother appeared. She said:
-Well, well, well… So you’re trying to defend this town?
-Yes, Fairy Godmother.
-Oh! What a cute boy! I can help you complete your mission. Only thing what you have to do is destroy the general.
-Where is he?
-In his base on the highest hill in Ruinberg.
-Thank you.-said Shrek starting his engine.
-But be carefull! General is defended by powerful tanks!
After some minutes Hero reached the hill called Hill of Arty. Why is it called like that? Oh! C’mon! Don’t you know or even think about it? Ehh… it’s defended by arty, but not a normal arty. It’s Angry Arty! Only it’s big gun can destroy Holy Loewe. Shrek immediately started to find a cover, but it was a hill with grass only so he decided to ride behind it and ram it. It was hard, but he finnaly did it! A powerful weapon of  Soviet Union  is destroyed and general put a white flag above his tent. Ruinberg was saved by a Brave Tanker-Shrek. He became a hero in one day and citizens put him on a piedestal as a “Hero of Ruinberg”!
THE END

There are 3052 characters in this story. Enjoy ;D

(Sorry for bad grammar, I’m german. ^^” – 4.233 symbols)
The Quest for the sacred fuel tank

These are desperate times in the world of Tanks, thought Leichtraktor when he wandered through the streets of Panzer, his hometown. They call him “Happy Leichtraktor”, but the cause for that is not nearly as curious as it is sad. It is a scar, marking his whole rear, which appears to look like a smiling face. This scar was caused by the metal thirsting horror which is named Shreck.

When he was a little stock tank, the monster attacked his town. Fueling the streets with fire and the air with fear, as the 20 meter tall monster approached the garage, which he called his home. Ripping away the roof, his father Brave Tanker, a Tiger, stood against it, to protect his family. In a matter of seconds the monster tried to attack Leichtraktor, but his father jumped in, to save his son, knowing the outcome of this desperate attempt to save his family. By ramming his son as hard as he could, to get him out of the garage, Brave Tanker damaged not only himself, but his son too. So Leichtraktor fell down the hillside of his home garage. The only thing he could see, was the bright light, that the fiery breath of the monster caused to his family.

When all the terror was gone, Leichtraktor found his father dead and his mother heavily injured. The armor of a Luchs wasn’t enough to protect her of the crimson claws of Shrek. She’s sick now, poisoned by the horror, that destroyed Leichtraktors family in only one short night. There is a cure for this wound. It’s said to be the sacred fuel tank, containing a mix of oil, which is capable of curing one of any poisoning.

But to achieve this cure, one must journey through a number of trials. To find out what the trials are about, he left Panzer with his good friend, Angry Arty. Arty is actually a SU-18. Arty got bullied a lot in the tank academy, duo to his foreign background. This is the reason for his nickname. If you shoot your bullies hard enough, they eventually leave you alone. But this wouldn’t help every time. It was Leichtraktor who protected him against a gang of higher tier tanks ones. They both got beat up good, but in the end it tightened their emerging friendship.

As they travelled through the country to search for the only tank, knowing the secret of the sacred fuel tank, they encountered many obstacles, blocking their way. But they never turned their backs to the journey, a single time.

After 4 months of driving through any kind of landscape, they arrived at the Mecca of every tank, Fabrika. Insecure, but steadily, they approached the cathedral, located in the center of the town. Here they hoped to receive an audience with the Holy Loewe. Left as the only tank in this world, knowing of the trials, required for obtaining the sacred fuel tank, he guided many tanks into their perdition.

One night in the local inn wasn’t enough to let their tracks gain strength, but there was no time to rest. When the daylight shined through the dirty window of their inn, the time had come to see the elder of the cathedral, Holy Loewe.
A huge, but worn out canon and tracks that wouldn’t take any tank across the next border, were the first things the friends noticed. On the other hand, a kind nature and a gentle voice welcomed them into the holy halls of the cathedral. Surprised, that the friends were only two, but somehow calm about their upcoming journey, he revealed the three trials to obtain the sacred fuel tank.

The first trial lies in the valley of Schlamm, were they have to find tin gods, called “The 7 dwarves”. Those tin gods have to be brought to a cave, near the valley. In this cave they will find the other two trials. One is the guardian of the cave, a giant dragon, called Fafnir. If the two friends manage to get past Fafnir, the cave will guide them to the end of the cave. At this point, the Fairy Godmother will await those, who stood against the trials and give them a riddle. To solve this riddle, not only mind will be tested, but also heart, ehm engine.

So the brave friends set tracks to their next destination, unknowing of the dangerous traps and obstacles in their imminent way, but eager in achieving the so desperately sought sacred fuel tank.
To be continued.