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Wot evening tale


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Pattonizer #1 Posted 25 June 2018 - 08:54 PM

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Hello young and old, this is tonight's evening tale.

Once upon a time, Pattonizer the Little Silly wandered towards the hills of Karelia. But whoo-hooo does he look at the map... 'Oh my jolly dear!' - he cries out. It seems he feels quite alone.
 


 

Pattonizer the Naive asks for help as he is too little and dummy to wander the dangerous wilderness alone.




Sadly it seems no one likes Patzy, because of his **** up blue color. Dang it! Well what should he do? Such a silly thing, of course follow the others to warm each others with their body heat. By the time little Pattonizer arrives he sees such things no WOT player should ever see. So indescribably horrible only a good screenshot could tell the tale.




Holly molly! - cries Pattonizer the Late in the inside. What am I going to do. I should have stayed in the base for a good picnic! That's it, let's go back save that T30. But oh my, by the time Pattonizer the Dummy makes his decision, the enemy shots him. They demand him to stay. What a twist!




No need to worry! The teammates have surely pushed back the enemy by now! Oh wait...




7 tanks standing out next to each other did not work! How can this be? What kind of black magic the enemy uses against us?




Pattonizer the Coward left alone. Look at that smurf, almost no contribution to the battle. Will he get his proper punishment?




Why the hell would he not?

This was today's evening session, have a good night's sleep, Dear Kids. :)

THE END
 


Edited by Pattonizer, 25 June 2018 - 08:59 PM.


Xandania #2 Posted 25 June 2018 - 09:27 PM

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Well written. I hope we will get a continuation of Pattonizer the Unready, Hero of legends :)

 

I guess we all know that feeling (and that situation), but you really amde me laugh hard about it. Thank you.



jabster #3 Posted 25 June 2018 - 09:31 PM

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Have you considered finding a game that you enjoy playing?

Pattonizer #4 Posted 25 June 2018 - 09:38 PM

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View PostXandania, on 25 June 2018 - 08:27 PM, said:

Well written. I hope we will get a continuation of Pattonizer the Unready, Hero of legends :)

 

I guess we all know that feeling (and that situation), but you really amde me laugh hard about it. Thank you.

 

Thank thee kind sir! The bards shall sing us more tales in the future, I'm sure of it.

 

View Postjabster, on 25 June 2018 - 08:31 PM, said:

Have you considered finding a game that you enjoy playing?


You may believe it or not, but this one was so over the edge, I've enjoyed it.


Edited by Pattonizer, 25 June 2018 - 09:38 PM.


wsatnutter #5 Posted 25 June 2018 - 09:39 PM

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I was hooked

Nethraniel #6 Posted 25 June 2018 - 09:40 PM

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Ugh... graphic settings look a bit offensive though...

 

But btt... was it really worth it to put so much effort in a fail-lemming train match post battle report in the forums?

 

Ah, I guess if you feel better now, it was worth it.


Edited by Nethraniel, 25 June 2018 - 09:44 PM.


Element6 #7 Posted 25 June 2018 - 09:43 PM

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It's one of these things that seem so incredible it should be a rare occurrence, that every one of us experience several times on a weekly basis, and the more active of us a few times a day.

Pattonizer #8 Posted 25 June 2018 - 09:56 PM

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View PostNethraniel, on 25 June 2018 - 08:40 PM, said:

Ugh... graphic settings look a bit offensive though...

 

But btt... was it really worth it to put so much effort in a fail-lemming train match post battle report in the forums?

 

Ah, I guess if you feel better now, it was worth it.

 

Actually I do feel better.

Dorander #9 Posted 25 June 2018 - 10:36 PM

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I think for the sake of consistency and so as to not confuse the little children (as some threads recently revealed some people let their 5 year olds play), these awesome stories should only be revealed when you're actually driving a Patton tank.

 

Other than that, that was actually pretty creative :teethhappy:



OreH75 #10 Posted 25 June 2018 - 10:37 PM

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AH the infamous lemmingtrain that doesnt push the flank where they have way more tanks then the enemy, instead they keep peeking out and trading shots badly until the last one dies....have had that 2 times tonight also.

Edited by OreH75, 25 June 2018 - 10:37 PM.


NUKLEAR_SLUG #11 Posted 26 June 2018 - 02:37 PM

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There seems to be some implication here that Pattonizers team may have been less than stellar. Would it be rude to point out the autoloading french heavy appears to have only contributed two meaningful shots in 4 mins?

Bordhaw #12 Posted 26 June 2018 - 06:55 PM

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View PostOreH75, on 25 June 2018 - 09:37 PM, said:

AH the infamous lemmingtrain that doesnt push the flank where they have way more tanks then the enemy, instead they keep peeking out and trading shots badly until the last one dies....have had that 2 times tonight also.

 

Thought that was just normal what with everyone ignoring the field on ENSK, ignoring the hill on Himmelsdorf, ignoring the hill on Malinovka, ignoring the hill on Prohorovka and ignoring the field in Ruinberg. 

Dorander #13 Posted 26 June 2018 - 10:02 PM

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View PostBordhaw, on 26 June 2018 - 05:55 PM, said:

 

Thought that was just normal what with everyone ignoring the field on ENSK, ignoring the hill on Himmelsdorf, ignoring the hill on Malinovka, ignoring the hill on Prohorovka and ignoring the field in Ruinberg. 

 

You forgot ignoring the hill on Mines.

Element6 #14 Posted 26 June 2018 - 10:47 PM

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View PostBordhaw, on 26 June 2018 - 06:55 PM, said:

Thought that was just normal what with everyone ignoring the field on ENSK, ignoring the hill on Himmelsdorf, ignoring the hill on Malinovka, ignoring the hill on Prohorovka and ignoring the field in Ruinberg. 

So you get teams that actually want to contest the field on Siegfried Line? Lucky bastard :P

 

View PostDorander, on 26 June 2018 - 10:02 PM, said:

You forgot ignoring the hill on Mines.

That one actually makes sense sometimes, when the enemy has 3 tanks that are fast and your team has 1. If you are in the fast tank, you could try, but it usually ends up starting the battle 14 vs. 15.

 






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