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If I wanted to get pissed off at stupid crap, I would play golf

#WGing give my money back!

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Henk_die_oorwinar #1 Posted 16 October 2019 - 09:46 PM

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So, I asked my mate the one day: "Hey you wanky tosser, why do you play golf¿" 

 

To me this seemed like a good question to ask; Golf is just barely north of watching paint dry and they look at you funny when you take a dip in the pond??? WTF is a lad supposed  to do when he is four beers and a tequila  ahead and the sun be beating down?

 

Well, so my mate said: "Boet, it's  like this you see. I drive a Landrover, as such, I am quite used to infernal things driving me up the wall, but unlike my Landrover: every now and then the Lady Luck herself smiles on me and I make the perfect drive or I sink that long put. It is these moments that put all the other moments into place and make it all worthwhile."

 

Bloody silly bunch those golfers really.  

 

But sitting at the end of another 15/5 loss, I am starting to think. Is it just maby possible  that the lovely  people over at WGing HQ have looked at mildly addictive hobbies that people spend way to much money on(It's those pink Lacoste golf pants... the bloody things cost an arm and a leg) and keep comming  back to?

 

I am not going to go into the way that WGing manipulates games, their outcomes  and individual player's winrate; I personally  see at as an obvious  and glaring reality, but then there is a whole bunch of lovely young men -possibly a young woman too- on this forum that would gladly put me on a pyre and be done with it. Please note, my comment  about lovely young men is inclusive  of all the people here, but for Mr Jigobatchitcrazy or was thag Jigobatchy or Batchi? And his sidekick... the Slug, Pug, well some king of ****ug? Just imagine that, a nuclear pug! 

 

To them, WGing is the bastion of sportsmanship, sugar and spice and all things nice. Jolly good fellows that are just trying to make a buck... which strangely rimes with slug... you don't  think the Slug chap is some kind of WGing experiment that was supposed  to go to Roswell?

 

I am starting to feel a bit like the hippo in Hungry Hippos, you ask yourself at some point: Why do I do this! Why all the violence and the head bashing, if I really that hungry just have a biscuit! I mean, really,  at the end of it all, what does it mean to be green... or gray, sorry. Do I really  need to go through all this again and again, all I wanted, all I ever really wanted: was to be me!!!:

 

The golfer might ask: Why don't  I just chuck this stupid white ball in the foookin hole, give the snoty toss pot that I playing with the finger and then have a scone and a cuppa? You know, one of those really  naughty scones with the cream and the strawberry jam... ooowh be still my beating heart! Thou does betray my yearing!

 

Instead ofcourse; what we all do is: line up on the "t"... get told that, that is infact the ladies "t"... get asked to please play the shot from the mens "t"... take the shot and the promptly put on the old Wellies as I need to go boldly forth to retrieve my ball for the pond... in which I may still not take a dip!!!! 

 

So it is also with Tanks. You get pigeonholed into a losing team, were you are handed a stick with a nob on the end and told to go fight a bunch of tier 10 space marines with nuclear gatling canons. This is also know as the aforementioned RNG. RNG explains why I shoot 40... yes forty gold shots and pen 20 in a tier 8 game that we lost....... wait for it...........

 

wait

 

 

wait for it.....

 

 

 

DAIRY!

 

 

sorry, wrong story.

 

 

We lost: 15/5! 

 

Yes WGing! Ofcourse I will lose when you only allow me to pen 50% of my PREMUIM shots! So what you are saying is that I would pen even less if I was shooting normal non-special projectiles! WGing, please accept this incredulous: "FFS!" from me. 

 

Oooh yes, before I forget, as the title of my little tirade says:

 

I want my money back! But I will accept a 55% winrate aswell, so you chaps over there in Novgorod go pow wow and get uncle Henk his winning ticket! You savvy?

 

 

 


Edited by Henk_die_oorwinar, 16 October 2019 - 10:00 PM.


divsmo #2 Posted 16 October 2019 - 09:48 PM

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Can we get a tldr?

Henk_die_oorwinar #3 Posted 16 October 2019 - 09:51 PM

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View Postdivsmo, on 16 October 2019 - 09:48 PM, said:

Can we get a tldr?

You want to get one? No buddy, youz gots to work for those my boy... but you are welcome to give me one.



pihip #4 Posted 16 October 2019 - 09:52 PM

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View Postdivsmo, on 16 October 2019 - 09:48 PM, said:

Can we get a tldr?


He's lost one too many games (landslides he claims) and came here to vent.



Erwin_Von_Braun #5 Posted 16 October 2019 - 09:54 PM

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View PostHenk_die_oorwinar, on 16 October 2019 - 08:46 PM, said:

So, I asked my mate the one day: "Hey you wanky tosser, why do you play golf¿"

 

To me this seemed like a good question to ask; Golf is just barely north of watching paint dry and they look at you funny when you take a dip in the pond??? WTF is a lad supposed  to do when he is four beers and a tequila  ahead and the sun be beating down?

 

Well, so my mate said: "Boet, it's  like this you see. I drive a Landrover, as such, I am quite used to infernal things driving me up the wall, but unlike my Landrover: every now and then the Lady Luck herself smiles on me and I make the perfect drive or I sink that long put. It is these moments that put all the other moments into place and make it all worthwhile."

 

Bloody silly bunch those golfers really. 

 

But sitting at the end of another 15/5 loss, I am starting to think. Is it just maby possible  that the lovely  people over at WGing HQ have looked at mildly addictive hobbies that people spend way to much money on(It's those pink Lacoste golf pants... the bloody things cost an arm and a leg) and keep comming  back to?

 

I am not going to go into the way that WGing manipulates games, their outcomes  and individual player's winrate; I personally  see at as an obvious  and glaring reality, but then there is a whole bunch of lovely young men -possibly a young woman too- on this forum that would gladly put me on a pyre and be done with it. Please note, my comment  about lovely young men is inclusive  of all the people here, but for Mr Jigobatchitcrazy or was thag Jigobatchy or Batchi? And his sidekick... the Slug, Pug, well some king of ****ug? Just imagine that, a nuclear pug!

 

To them, WGing is the bastion of sportsmanship, sugar and spice and all things nice. Jolly good fellows that are just trying to make a buck... which strangely rimes with slug... you don't  think the Slug chap is some kind of WGing experiment that was supposed  to go to Roswell?

 

I am starting to feel a bit like the hippo in Hungry Hippos, you ask yourself at some point: Why don't  I just chuck this stupid white ball in the foookin hole, give the snoty toss pot that I playing with the finger and then have a scone and a cuppa? You know, one of those really  naughty scones with the cream and the strawberry jam... ooowh be still my beating heart! Thou does betray my yearing!

 

Instead ofcourse; what we all do is: line up on the "t"... get told that, that is infact the ladies "t"... get asked to please play the shot from the mens "t"... take the shot and the promptly put on the old Wellies as I need to go boldly forth to retrieve my ball for the pond... in which I may still not take a dip!!!!

 

So it is also with Tanks. You get pigeonholed into a losing team, were you are handed a stick with a nob on the end and told to go fight a bunch of tier 10 space marines with nuclear gatling canons. This is also know as the aforementioned RNG. RNG explains why I shoot 40... yes forty gold shots and pen 20 in a tier 8 game that we lost....... wait for it...........

 

wait

 

 

wait for it.....

 

 

 

DAIRY!

 

 

sorry, wrong story.

 

 

We lost: 15/5!

 

Yes WGing! Ofcourse I will lose when you only allow me to pen 50% of my PREMUIM shots! So what you are saying is that I would pen even less if I was shooting normal non-special projectiles! WGing, please accept this incredulous: "FFS!" from me.

 

Oooh yes, before I forget, as the title of my little tirade says:

 

I want my money back! But I will accept a 55% winrate aswell, so you chaps over there in Novgorod go pow wow and get uncle Henk his winning ticket! You savvy?

 

 

 

Try playing Alien Isolation on Nightmare difficulty - that will teach you the true meaning of peed off :trollface:



Henk_die_oorwinar #6 Posted 16 October 2019 - 09:54 PM

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View Postpihip, on 16 October 2019 - 09:52 PM, said:


He's lost one too many games (landslides he claims) and came here to vent.

One to many you say! Nay my good sir, I say to thee respectfully: ITS MORE LIKE 20!



unhappy_bunny #7 Posted 16 October 2019 - 10:38 PM

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I like this rant, espcially the golfing bit.

Because in golf, the player never loses because of lack of skill compared to his opponent(s). 

In golf, who do you blame for not winning? Of course, the company that made your clubs, or the ball, maybe blame the weather.It's never that the golfer is just not good enough to win or play well, its always someone else to blame. 

Just as well the players in WoT don't look at it the same way.



Negativvv #8 Posted 16 October 2019 - 10:50 PM

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View Postdivsmo, on 16 October 2019 - 09:48 PM, said:

Can we get a tldr?

Look across at record :(



mateyflip #9 Posted 16 October 2019 - 10:54 PM

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Yet another unhappy bunny moaning that things haven't ALWAYS gone their way.

 

Mega hugz to the OP.

 

(Got this in before its locked ;) ;)



unhappy_bunny #10 Posted 16 October 2019 - 10:58 PM

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View Postmateyflip, on 16 October 2019 - 09:54 PM, said:

Yet another unhappy bunny moaning that things haven't ALWAYS gone their way.

 

Mega hugz to the OP.

 

(Got this in before its locked ;) ;)

 

I wasn't moaning. Stop trying to name and shame me. :teethhappy:



UrQuan #11 Posted 16 October 2019 - 11:00 PM

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View PostHenk_die_oorwinar, on 16 October 2019 - 09:46 PM, said:

 

We lost: 15/5! 

 

Yes WGing! Ofcourse I will lose when you only allow me to pen 50% of my PREMUIM shots! So what you are saying is that I would pen even less if I was shooting normal non-special projectiles! WGing, please accept this incredulous: "FFS!" from me. 

 

Oooh yes, before I forget, as the title of my little tirade says:

 

I want my money back! But I will accept a 55% winrate aswell, so you chaps over there in Novgorod go pow wow and get uncle Henk his winning ticket! You savvy?

 

The TLDR shortie: 'we lose cause my prem ammo didn't work'

 

Surprise; prem ammo is NOT autopen. Would be terrible design if it was (it does make it alot easier to pen targets tho). Still got to aim. And tracks make for great HEAT absorbers (and other prem shell absorbers when you shoot too low/badly)

 

The Gold! It does nothing!

And that folks, is why some folks spam HE. Even when it does't make sense.


Edited by UrQuan, 16 October 2019 - 11:05 PM.


Balc0ra #12 Posted 16 October 2019 - 11:01 PM

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View PostHenk_die_oorwinar, on 16 October 2019 - 09:46 PM, said:

I am not going to go into the way that WGing manipulates games, their outcomes  and individual player's winrate; I personally  see at as an obvious  and glaring reality,

 

WOT is the only game that can pull that off. Get people to think they rig everything, and still make them stay. I'm amazed when I read it. Why are you still here then if you are so sure WG wants to bounce half your shots and have a 41% WR on that tank? I mean any other game people would leave instantly if they thought the game worked against them.

 

View PostUrQuan, on 16 October 2019 - 11:00 PM, said:

The Gold! It does nothing!

 

And that's the issue for some. It's easier to blame WG when you fail, then to take 5 seconds to notice why the shell did nothing and learn something from it.


Edited by Balc0ra, 16 October 2019 - 11:04 PM.


BravelyRanAway #13 Posted 16 October 2019 - 11:04 PM

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Oh look...it's him again.....the last holiday from the forum must have ended.

Evilier_than_Skeletor #14 Posted 16 October 2019 - 11:19 PM

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View Postunhappy_bunny, on 16 October 2019 - 10:38 PM, said:

 

In golf, who do you blame for not winning? Of course, the company that made your clubs, or the ball,

Ummm...a whole bunch of golfers do just that and buy new gear every summer.

 

Henk, I wish there was something to be done to soothe your pain and help you out. Unfortunately all you can do is put on your big boy pink Lacostes and deal with it.



HassenderZerhacker #15 Posted 16 October 2019 - 11:29 PM

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View PostHenk_die_oorwinar, on 16 October 2019 - 09:46 PM, said:

[bla-bla] golf [bla-bla]

Golf [bla-bla]

[bla-bla] perfect drive

long put[bla-bla]

[bla-bla] golfers[bla-bla] 

 

I don't know what's your problem with golf - it's much less frustrating than WoT. Sometimes I would just shoot balls left and right, yes, but if I really play it safe I still manage a 90 no problem. And at least in golf, there is no team to lose the game for you... players manage to do that all by themselves!



Spurtung #16 Posted 17 October 2019 - 01:37 AM

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View Postdivsmo, on 16 October 2019 - 08:48 PM, said:

Can we get a tldr?

 

OP seems to be scratching the surface about the correlation between controlled frustration and addiction.



NUKLEAR_SLUG #17 Posted 17 October 2019 - 02:02 AM

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View Postdivsmo, on 16 October 2019 - 09:48 PM, said:

Can we get a tldr?

 

"I'm bad at pixel tanks , but I like the sound of my own voice." 



Dorander #18 Posted 17 October 2019 - 02:05 AM

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Hey Henk, nice to see your most recent ban ran out.

 

The reason you don't play golf is that golfclubs don't necessarily come with a forum to complain on. You're welcome. :)



NoobySkooby #19 Posted 17 October 2019 - 02:08 AM

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View Postpihip, on 16 October 2019 - 09:52 PM, said:


He's lost one too many games (landslides he claims) and came here to vent.

I kind of like his vent, nicely formulated:popcorn:



malachi6 #20 Posted 17 October 2019 - 02:14 AM

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Your problems start with failing to realise that not everybody is you and escalate from there.




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